<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8"?><rss xmlns:dc="http://purl.org/dc/elements/1.1/" xmlns:content="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/content/" xmlns:atom="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom" version="2.0" xmlns:itunes="http://www.itunes.com/dtds/podcast-1.0.dtd" xmlns:googleplay="http://www.google.com/schemas/play-podcasts/1.0"><channel><title><![CDATA[abetteryou's Substack]]></title><description><![CDATA[My personal Substack]]></description><link>https://dementiajourney.substack.com</link><image><url>https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!F5LZ!,w_256,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1253d937-2d33-4952-a68e-87ae95ce463e_144x144.png</url><title>abetteryou&apos;s Substack</title><link>https://dementiajourney.substack.com</link></image><generator>Substack</generator><lastBuildDate>Sun, 31 May 2026 02:18:24 GMT</lastBuildDate><atom:link href="https://dementiajourney.substack.com/feed" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml"/><copyright><![CDATA[abetteryou]]></copyright><language><![CDATA[en]]></language><webMaster><![CDATA[dementiajourney@substack.com]]></webMaster><itunes:owner><itunes:email><![CDATA[dementiajourney@substack.com]]></itunes:email><itunes:name><![CDATA[abetteryou]]></itunes:name></itunes:owner><itunes:author><![CDATA[abetteryou]]></itunes:author><googleplay:owner><![CDATA[dementiajourney@substack.com]]></googleplay:owner><googleplay:email><![CDATA[dementiajourney@substack.com]]></googleplay:email><googleplay:author><![CDATA[abetteryou]]></googleplay:author><itunes:block><![CDATA[Yes]]></itunes:block><item><title><![CDATA[Don’t Mail Back Surveys or Donations, Etc. ]]></title><description><![CDATA[Pick the causes you care about and toss the rest. Don't care about them all.]]></description><link>https://dementiajourney.substack.com/p/dont-mail-back-surveys-or-donations</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://dementiajourney.substack.com/p/dont-mail-back-surveys-or-donations</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[abetteryou]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Fri, 15 May 2026 21:41:23 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!F5LZ!,w_256,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1253d937-2d33-4952-a68e-87ae95ce463e_144x144.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>My dad mailed back every survey or donation solicitation sent to him &#8211; usually with a check or credit card number. Political mailings were donated to &#8211; much went to representatives in other states who would not represent Dad where he is. &#8220;Social Security &#8220;solicitations that sent him into panic and he felt like he had to respond, even though it wasn&#8217;t from Social Security. There are solicitations for every type of cause &#8211; animals, forests, tree society, and more (much more).</p><p>The amount of donations is astounding and by responding with money to one or more increases the number of solicitations that are sent back out. If no money is sent and only a survey filled out, it&#8217;s likely just tossed at the other end and might or might not use your information to sell.</p><p>There is a good chance that the credit card option will give them a way to keep charging or putting the card into their system. Checks can be whitewashed and redone for larger amounts. They have all the routing numbers to make new checks with and pull from your account.</p><p>My dad used to give me all kinds of calendars and bags that the companies sent to him. He had no use for a dozen calendars, so he gave them to me. I also had no use for so many (and not wanting ones that were many months of advertising). I recycled the bulk of them &#8211; so it was a waste for them to send those.</p><p>The more donations you make, the more you will get, and the more will ask for money. Just don&#8217;t send them back, or at least just pick the few you do like and support. Then donate to those few and toss the others out. Dad spent well over $10K in donations when his dementia could no longer decide.</p><p>PR</p><p><a href="https://doubleii.com/avoid-getting-scammed/">More on scams </a></p><p><a href="https://doubleii.com/elderly/">More on elderly and dementia</a></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Celebrating My Dad’s 90th Birthday!]]></title><description><![CDATA[Dad with dementia but still loves to go out to eat.]]></description><link>https://dementiajourney.substack.com/p/celebrating-my-dads-90th-birthday</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://dementiajourney.substack.com/p/celebrating-my-dads-90th-birthday</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[abetteryou]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Tue, 12 May 2026 22:14:56 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!F5LZ!,w_256,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1253d937-2d33-4952-a68e-87ae95ce463e_144x144.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>My dad, with dementia, had his 90<sup>th</sup> birthday. His health is good and he&#8217;s taking care of himself, being no danger to anyone or self. He grooms himself so needs no help. He&#8217;s able to stay in independent living.</p><p>Dad always loved a certain restaurant, having taken clients there when he was a realtor. As much as he loves the food in his facility dining room (and tries to compel us to eat there), we can always convince him to eat out if it is at that restaurant or a Mexican one (since the dining room doesn&#8217;t serve spicy foods for the seniors).</p><p>I got a reservation at the restaurant, so the main thing I had to do in the morning is to remind him (several times) to ONLY eat breakfast but not lunch because we are coming to get him.</p><p>I know he always feels special and happy when we take him to eat out &#8211; that is what I want for him.</p><p>When Mom was in a dementia ward, my sister and I (and my 4-year-old daughter) took her to a McDonald&#8217;s nearby (we did not know how well she would do either in the car or in the place). It turned out that she was so happy to get out that she completely behaved. It was the last time we had a nice time out with her, as she declined rapidly after that.</p><p>Dad has a habit of saying he isn&#8217;t hungry and can&#8217;t eat much. But if you order or place food in front of him, he will start eating and usually eats the entire thing or close to it.</p><p>So, having no idea how many lunches we can keep having with him, each one needs to be special.</p><p><a href="https://open.substack.com/pub/dementiajourney/p/celebrating-my-dads-90th-birthday">More Articles About My Elderly Dad and His Dementia Issues</a></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Dad Confirmed He’s Not Taking His Meds]]></title><description><![CDATA[Dementia medications are important to the wellness of the elderly.]]></description><link>https://dementiajourney.substack.com/p/dad-confirmed-hes-not-taking-his</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://dementiajourney.substack.com/p/dad-confirmed-hes-not-taking-his</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[abetteryou]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Tue, 12 May 2026 21:39:24 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!F5LZ!,w_256,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1253d937-2d33-4952-a68e-87ae95ce463e_144x144.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Dad let my sister know he doesn&#8217;t take his medications except when he feels like maybe he should. Whatever that means, it&#8217;s not good.</p><p>The medications for dementia need to be taken consistently and at the same time. He takes a medicine to slow down the progression, and one is a mood stabilizer. He has a couple of supplements, as well.</p><p>Dad has been &#8220;off&#8221; several times, and I always suspected that he wasn&#8217;t taking his medications consistently. </p><p>In digging further, he said he just takes them when he thinks he needs them &#8211; that&#8217;s not how it works. They need to be taken every day, at the same time, and build up in the system. There were weeks where he skipped some days, weeks where he took them all week long, and other weeks where he took none.</p><p>He cannot make his own decisions on when he needs medicine or not. Dementia clouds the thinking &#8211; he doesn&#8217;t realize when he&#8217;s ok or not. The medicine doesn&#8217;t work right if it isn&#8217;t taken consistently.</p><p>We are looking at options to have someone administer his meds.</p><p><a href="https://doubleii.com/elderly/">More Articles About Dad and Elderly</a></p><p><a href="https://advancelawsuitfunding.com">Need a Lawsuit Advance?</a></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[MoCA and SLUMS Tests Are Not Cognitive Tests]]></title><description><![CDATA[Dad took all these tests....]]></description><link>https://dementiajourney.substack.com/p/moca-and-slums-tests-are-not-cognitive</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://dementiajourney.substack.com/p/moca-and-slums-tests-are-not-cognitive</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[abetteryou]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Sat, 02 May 2026 19:11:14 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!F5LZ!,w_256,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1253d937-2d33-4952-a68e-87ae95ce463e_144x144.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>The indicative tests that look for mental decline are MoCA and SLUMS tests. They are given periodically to gauge decline, maybe every year to see the pattern of decline. They are pretty simple questions for most people, including recall. The drawing of a clock face with a time might need to be redesigned for the new generation who do not use clocks or watches.</p><p>Once there is a drop in testing to a certain level of those tests, a cognitive test might be ordered or suggested. A cognitive test is several hours long and might even be split into two days for those who get exhausted physically or mentally.</p><p>The cognitive test is more subjective, not necessarily a right or wrong answer. The reasonings are evaluated when situations are brought up to solve. If the questions lead to a dangerous conclusion, which happened with my dad (his solution to a question of saving his life would not have led to any solution &#8211; it was a disconnection and a red flag). The process of coming to an answer is also considered. It&#8217;s not a 100% getting it right type of test.</p><p>I went through all this with my dad &#8211; I saw his test results of the MoCA and SLUMS &#8211; then got a full analysis of the results from the cognitive tests. More of the testing came out in court.</p><p>MoCA and SLUMS tests are neither a cognitive test nor an IQ test. They are indicator tests looking for mental decline.</p><p><a href="https://doubleii.com/elderly/">More Articles on Elderly Issues and Dementia</a></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Senior Need Oxygen?]]></title><description><![CDATA[Dad needs more solutions to his issues as he gets older. Oxygen and water are those now.]]></description><link>https://dementiajourney.substack.com/p/senior-need-oxygen</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://dementiajourney.substack.com/p/senior-need-oxygen</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[abetteryou]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Wed, 18 Feb 2026 20:46:17 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!F5LZ!,w_256,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1253d937-2d33-4952-a68e-87ae95ce463e_144x144.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>My dad has low oxygen level and low blood pressure (BP). His BP drops further when he tries to stand up from his chair, making him dizzy. He is also sleepy and exhausted all day long.</p><p>There are two effects from his low levels that can help if he bumps up his intake. He needs to drink more water, and he needs to up his oxygen level. That would likely help with both his dizziness and his BP drop.</p><p>We tell him to drink more and have the people who visit with him drink more while with him. The oxygen will be delivered tomorrow so we are talking to him how being on it will improve his dizziness and energy level. He will have to be on it for a bit before he notices a difference. We need to make him realize it will help, because having the apparatus in his nose and in his face will be a hard thing to get him to accept.</p><p>I am hoping the benefits will overcome his resistance to the optics and feeling in his nose. At his age, vanity should no longer matter compared to his health improving. The discomfort will go away after a while. I had to be on oxygen after surgery for a couple or so weeks, until I got my deep breathing to work. You just get used to it.</p><p>Once he&#8217;s on it and feels better, we will keep telling him it&#8217;s very helpful to keep the oxygen on him because it is making a difference. At his age, he can&#8217;t work his lungs to do better breathing to be able to get off the oxygen.</p><p>So if your senior needs oxygen, help her understand how it improves her health and life. Help her want the oxygen so she can feel better.</p><p><a href="https://doubleii.com/elderly/">More on my journey with my parents, aging and dementia</a></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Make Flashcards To Train Your Brain]]></title><description><![CDATA[Not only good for a person with dementia, but also for the rest of us to challenge our brains.]]></description><link>https://dementiajourney.substack.com/p/make-flashcards-to-train-your-brain</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://dementiajourney.substack.com/p/make-flashcards-to-train-your-brain</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[abetteryou]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Mon, 16 Feb 2026 23:36:30 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!F5LZ!,w_256,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1253d937-2d33-4952-a68e-87ae95ce463e_144x144.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Work on your memory. You can make flashcards to train your brain to remember short term recall.</p><p>I have always had trouble remembering new peoples&#8217; names right after I meet them. I realize that recent recall might not be my best skill.</p><p>I decided I should make flashcards to train my brain to remember better. The flashcards would be words of totally unrelated, random words or phrases. Then I would shuffle them, grab 5 or so, look at them and set them aside.</p><p>Then try to recall the 5 cards 10 minutes later, then again in 30 minutes and maybe later again in the day. Do this every day, shuffling the cards and recalling the words and phrases again in interval times.</p><p>Index cards work or cut up papers that have writing on one side and blank on the other side, so they are the same size. I keep papers that are blank on one side so I can make note paper from them.</p><p>Make flashcards to train your brain to remember short term recall.</p><p>PR</p><p><a href="https://doubleii.com/elderly/">More articles on Dementia and more topics</a></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Dehydration of the Elderly]]></title><description><![CDATA[I just found out that my dad is dehydrated. Elderly dehydration can cause issues.]]></description><link>https://dementiajourney.substack.com/p/dehydration-of-the-elderly</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://dementiajourney.substack.com/p/dehydration-of-the-elderly</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[abetteryou]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Thu, 08 Jan 2026 23:22:53 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!F5LZ!,w_256,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1253d937-2d33-4952-a68e-87ae95ce463e_144x144.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>My dad gets low blood pressure issues when he stands up from his chair.</p><p>His caretaker said many of her clients have had the same issue, but often it is rectified once the person starts hydrating more. It could be due to dehydration.</p><p>My dad was found to be dehydrated. Dementia dehydration is bad for the brain and body.</p><p>My dad has waned down on his drinking from when I was living at home &#8211; he might just drink his coffee in the morning and water when he takes his medications. He also has frequent diarrhea which sucks fluids from his system. He gets diarrhea from ingesting dairy &#8211; he is likely lactose intolerant.</p><p>We are trying to get a lactate pill into him daily to help the diarrhea and now that we know he is dehydrated, we all will encourage him to drink water with every visit and every phone call. The caretakers will make him drink when they visit him.</p><p>We want the blood pressure issue to be resolved and also the dehydration issue. Hopefully drinking more will take care of those things, Dehydration of the elderly can cause some serious issues.</p><p><a href="https://doubleii.com/elderly/">More of my articles about my experience with dementia and the elderly.</a></p><p></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[My Parents' Dementia Journey]]></title><description><![CDATA[Mom went first then it happened to my dad, many years later. Dementia is a cruel thief of memories and the thinking process. Making good decisions is no longer the case. This is my journey with them.]]></description><link>https://dementiajourney.substack.com/p/my-parents-dementia-journey</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://dementiajourney.substack.com/p/my-parents-dementia-journey</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[abetteryou]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Tue, 06 Jan 2026 18:06:39 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!Kkvb!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F95a9e934-9029-4e68-b1f4-bee7cf2953d5_1942x1982.jpeg" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://dementiajourney.substack.com/subscribe?&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Subscribe now&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary" href="https://dementiajourney.substack.com/subscribe?"><span>Subscribe now</span></a></p><h2>Mom was in her early 60&#8217;s when she passed away from dementia complications. Dad is dealing with dementia now. Both required me to become heavily involved, and boy did I learn a lot! I also learned way more about scams than I already knew.</h2><p></p><h3>I want to document what all we went through with both our parents. </h3><p>I got heavily involved with unusual issues with both Mom and with Dad. I want to share our story to help others.</p><h3>If you are dealing with dementia of your loved one(s), know that you are not alone. </h3><p> I&#8217;ll keep adding more as I think back on the things we went through, and as Dad provides more to discuss about.</p><h3>I&#8217;ll post probably weekly - sometimes more, sometimes less. It depends on what might or might not be happening with my dad. </h3><p>Is there a day you prefer to receive the articles? Is there anything you want me to discuss further about? </p><h3></h3><div class="image-gallery-embed" data-attrs="{&quot;gallery&quot;:{&quot;images&quot;:[{&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/jpeg&quot;,&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/95a9e934-9029-4e68-b1f4-bee7cf2953d5_1942x1982.jpeg&quot;}],&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;Mom in her last couple years&quot;,&quot;alt&quot;:&quot;She had aged so much and did not always recognize us anymore&quot;,&quot;staticGalleryImage&quot;:{&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/jpeg&quot;,&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/95a9e934-9029-4e68-b1f4-bee7cf2953d5_1942x1982.jpeg&quot;}},&quot;isEditorNode&quot;:true}"></div><p></p><h3></h3><div><hr></div><div class="subscription-widget-wrap-editor" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://dementiajourney.substack.com/subscribe?&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Subscribe&quot;,&quot;language&quot;:&quot;en&quot;}" data-component-name="SubscribeWidgetToDOM"><div class="subscription-widget show-subscribe"><div class="preamble"><p class="cta-caption">Thanks for reading abetteryou's Substack! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.</p></div><form class="subscription-widget-subscribe"><input type="email" class="email-input" name="email" placeholder="Type your email&#8230;" tabindex="-1"><input type="submit" class="button primary" value="Subscribe"><div class="fake-input-wrapper"><div class="fake-input"></div><div class="fake-button"></div></div></form></div></div><p></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Coming soon]]></title><description><![CDATA[This is abetteryou&#39;s Substack.]]></description><link>https://dementiajourney.substack.com/p/coming-soon</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://dementiajourney.substack.com/p/coming-soon</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[abetteryou]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Mon, 05 Jan 2026 21:17:18 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!F5LZ!,w_256,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1253d937-2d33-4952-a68e-87ae95ce463e_144x144.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>This is abetteryou&#39;s Substack.</p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://dementiajourney.substack.com/subscribe?&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Subscribe now&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary" href="https://dementiajourney.substack.com/subscribe?"><span>Subscribe now</span></a></p>]]></content:encoded></item></channel></rss>